When Discouragement Attacks Your Marriage

It was one of those mornings. I was tired and I just wanted a smooth morning with no crying or whining. To have the ability to get these morning smoothies out to everyone in a peaceful, calm manner, Kerwin’s lunch to him and possibly sneak in a morning nap.

NOPE! That wasn’t the case. I had Nehemiah still passed out in bed as if he worked 3rd shift. He should be up.

Jeremiah was standing on one side of me watching as if I would forget he was there waiting for his smoothie.

Eli on my other side crying because he was impatiently waiting for me to finish the smoothies and pick him up.

I didn’t have a good night, so I was extremely tired and sleepy. Here I am, pregnant feeling achy and sore and waking up all throughout the night not because of that! but because for some odd reason Eli decided it was a great night to protest getting sleep.

The morning couldn’t get anymore nerve wrecking.

I WAS WRONG!

Kerwin decided to jump in on the fun. He was standing there looking at a trade he just took (he’s a forex trader). It seemed to not be going in his favor. This would be the third trade this week that would end badly, if this wouldn’t turn around.

Image by John Hain from Pixabay

He started giving in to discouragement and hopelessness. As the words of doubt, worry and hopelessness came out of his mouth, I immediately felt a wave of weakness come over me. I was just finishing his lunch at this point. I handed it to him.

“I need a min” I said as I walked out the kitchen and went towards the bedroom. I got back in bed to collect my thoughts and get myself together.

I asked for Eli because I knew Kerwin was having to get ready to go. He brought him to me as he leaving for the day. I honestly can’t remember if we even kissed each other bye. I was so over it.

I finally got myself together and sent him a text so when he got to work he would read it and be encouraged.

It didn’t work. As we were texting back and forth, I could tell he was out for the count it seemed. I pushed and pushed to encourage him in the Lord, but he wasn’t hearing it. He said he had to go, he was about to drive.

Now normally when this sort of thing would happen I would call and push further hoping something I would say will make an impact or the light bulb would go off. And as usual I would have to back off and let him and God work it out.

So today I said to myself, I’m not calling. I need to get my own strength back up. I’m not gonna have this pull on me all day. I’m going to go on with what I need to do which is REST and prepare for my morning Bible study with the boys.

As the boys and I read our book about praying to God, at the end it had the following scripture:

Be anxious for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.”
Philippians 4:6

And even though I was reading to them, it applied to me. It was my right now word. I don’t need to give myself a headache trying to make sure Kerwin is okay. I need to not be anxious over this. I need to do what this scripture said. Take this into prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let my request be made known to God.

I know what to do. I laid Eli down for his morning nap and went into prayer.

It was at this moment, it was obvious I was stronger in Spirit. I wasn’t down by discouragement and instead of getting aggravated that he was discouraged, I needed to go into warfare on his behalf.

He didn’t need me to talk him into feeling better. He needed me to go and pray over his mind and declare and speak to his spirit man. Let it go and go about my day.

As I sat, Ephesians 6:12 “For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places” came to mind.

My fight was not with Kerwin or trying to convince him of anything, my fight was the spirit behind all of this and that is who I needed to go and confront. It was obvious by the way he was speaking, it wasn’t Kerwin, but the enemy speaking through Kerwin.

The Prayer

went something like this..

I begin by praying, thanking God for allowing me to see it for what it was and not to give in to discouragement myself.

I then declared the enemy to leave his mind. Allow Kerwin to see that this was the enemy . Remind him of your love Father. The thoughts of failure and hopeless was not of You Father. He feels abandoned, but allow him to remember that you will never leave him nor forsake him. Instead of having negative thoughts, Father I speak to Kerwin’s spirit to hear hope and prosperity. Where Kerwin hears God will not help in this area, remind him that You supply all our needs according to Your riches and glory in Christ Jesus.

3 John 1:2 says Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul prospereth.

You delight in our prosperity not our lack. Take back every thought that come to exalt itself against the knowledge of God .

I prayed the Word of God.

And guess what? Afterwards, I felt better and was able to release it. Not only that, God allowed me to get some sleep after because I was really sleepy, but I needed to press through on my husband’s behalf because it affects our family. My husband needed me. I’m not sure how long I slept, but I woke up refreshed and no longer tired.

I guess God is still showing me that when we put Him first He will take care of our needs.

Now I can resume my day. I trust that as I’m going about my day and Kerwin his, God is doing a work. And once we talk again there will be a difference. Either way God is in control.

I want to encourage you if and when your husband’s mind or even yours is under attack, remind yourself and the enemy who is in control.

Does your husband go through battles of the mind? When these episodes happen, how do you deal?

Is fighting in the spirit something you need to work on?
Share your thoughts! Let’s encourage one another.

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